Discipline Dang It Discipline

I thrive on the fact(in my mind) that I am a freakin creative genious....hahaha... yes I am laughing at myself. Ok so genious or not, I am creative inside my mind, have thousands of ideas, paintings pictures, songs, writings, movie ideas.... but rarely have expressed any of it. In the past few years I have been bound up, lazy, and irritated with myself. On occasion, I produce some glimmer of something new, something that expresses me or whats in me. So those of you who know me may be thinking that well you have been dealing with a hard marriage, divorce, single momdom, and a slew of other reasons not to have expressed much on the creative forefront. Stop it! Don't give me any excuses! I want to be disciplined! I want to start completing what I begin. I am about to begin a new chapter. A new start with my new husband, but also a new fervor for life and expression of it to the fullest. I don't want to have made excuses and find I have not accomplished even a fraction of my potential. I am realizing that to raise my kids to be ones who stay the course, completing the things they are to accomplish within them, I must be the example. Discipline... CRAP I need it. O to desire conviction to be motivated to keep daily disciplines. God help me.... really.